ahh 2012. what a year. this isn't going to be super eloquent or poetic but i want to summarize it for journaling and future reasons.
2012 was made up of: laughter, new friends, spending 2 weeks in the summer with 3 of my very very best friends(it was beyond awesome.), my health both improving and getting worse, new doctors, more tears than i care to count, late nights, tons of love from my siblings, love, deep heart talks(mostly late night because that's when the best times are ;), coaching my 7 year old brother's soccer team with my mom(what an experience! it was so fun and i loved it), saw many movies in the theater with my dad and/or friends, lots of pain, learned to drive a ATV/ 4 wheeler, awesome times with friends, went through a super hard time when my mom hurt her back(wow, was that tough), felt amazingly supported by friends(aka the body of Christ) and the biggest thing; my eyes and heart were opened to just how mighty the Lord is. How much He loves. and how amazing His love is. I can't put it into words but this year was full of pain, heartache and struggle and in the midst I am comforted and speechless about my Jesus and His love. I'm so tiny compared to Him. So wrecked and a complete mess. HE is the beauty and life. His love covers my pain and heals my heart. The pain is even worth it because of Him and His love. I truly believe that all this heartache and trials are not for nothing. I don't know what the reasons are for it, why the way my life is the way it is but I do know He loves me and that counts for everything.
I have terrible days and bits of sadness and I fit discouragement but I'm learning and ultimately I KNOW that God is in control and is above all. He is my hope.
I pray for 2013:
- that my relationship with Jesus would grow stronger and that I would continue to be amazed by His love and greatness.
- that I would love my siblings more. sincerely, and intently.
- that i would be the best friend I can be
- that i would not compare. i've been battling comparison for a few months and have been working on my heart. I am ME. and that's extraordinary. If I'm comparing myself to others negatively I'm no longer me, I'm a impersonation of that person and that's kinda like dissing Jesus ;) In other words, I'm working on loving myself.
- that i would remember, in the darkest times, that I am loved and supported so much.
- spend more time with friends and make a point to talk to those, who don't live near me very often.
- take more pictures. every minute is a memory :)
- read the Bible every day. I've never gone through with this goal but I really want to. Even though I don't want to some days, I NEED to.
- take a break from facebook, twitter and instagram for 2+ days
Fun 2013 goals:
- Watch all 3 of the extended versions of The Lord of the Rings(not all at the same time)
- Have a Batman marathon
- Go visit my best friends who live 8 hours away(the ones i visited in the summer)
- get my drivers license
- Visit my dear friend Sky(this would be an amazing dream come true! hehe ;)
- Decorate my bedroom wall more, I have things to use and hang up but haven't gotten around to it! I want to make some sort of picture collage(DIY from Pinterest?)
- I'm going to redesign my blog! a fresh look for the new year.
- Blog more
I leave 2012 and enter 2013 with this verse: I've memorized it and it means so much to me.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God
will be with you wherever you go."
happy new year!